You know that quote from Evan Almighty? "If one prays for patience, do you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If they pray for courage, does God give them courage, or does he give them opportunities to be courageous? If one prayed for their family to be closer, you think God zaps them with warm, fuzzy feelings? Or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"
This runs through my head all of the time because I ask for patience to deal with people all of the time. Except I'd rather just be handed the patience instead of being given the opportunities because, at times, I feel like I'm just put in a giant pit of opportunities and I fail miserably. I have such a short fuse and don't really like the person I'm becoming.... I just don't know where it's all coming from. Am I just growing up and taking less crap? Probably not because I still let people roll a red carpet over the top of me and do their runway walk. To so many people I feel like I'm 10 yrs old and am this stupid little girl and I don't know why. Kind of like when people brush off their shoulder.... I feel like I'm that fuzz that was brushed off. WHY?! I am not this damaged person who has had a terrible life. I come from this wonderful family, had a picture perfect childhood and yet I'm still not happy. What the heck does it take? I'm sick of stupid people. I'm sick of selfish people. I'm sick of being so kind to people and not getting it in return. Most of all, I'm sick of letting everything bug me. I'm sick of complaining!
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