Kind of sad how I don't have much to write when I'm not in school. I feel a little displaced and tonight, unfortunately, I'm in a bitter mood (which doesn't really improve from my last post). I am just blah... nothing to complain about because my life, compared to others, isn't bad at all. It's just little things.... sometimes though when you have friends going through tough times that actually matter, your problems don't really seem so bad. I just wish more people would take time out of their day to think of others... I am sooo over selfishness. Whatever.
I've been working a ton lately, trying to save up money so I can pay for my last semester of school. Thrilled about that but at this point, let's just get this done. I feel myself getting more bitter as time drags on. Unfortunately I haven't done much this summer. I look back at last summer and this summer has disappointed me. :-( I feel like I'm bolted down while in school so I really wanted to get out of town for a while but that isn't happening. :-\ And so my realistic side says 'Amanda, be happy you had such a great summer last year... you can't have it every year' and I know. But this is my little space on the interweb and I can cry if I want to. ;-) I've still thought about doing a small trip somewhere, even if it's by myself, but I end up dismissing it (partly because of my obsession with Criminal Minds and the fact that I'd probably end up missing after stopping for gas at a stranded gas station... I can just feel it). It's probably better this way as I need to save up for Vegas in January (if that even happens). Ugh, I'm so pessimistic lately. I'm just sick of being let down or disappointed so my defense mechanism kicks in to prevent that from even happening.
I don't like feeling this way but I just want to do things... I want so many things and it feels like I'll never get them. :-\ I'm not patient but seriously, come on. And now that I've made myself tear up, I'm out.
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