Disturbed.

What the heck is going on with this world?




Does this not remind people of a cult? Honestly? It scares me. What in the world? This woman is teaching children to sing about change that a presidential candidate says he is going to put forth? Do these children even know what they're singing about? And gosh darn it, I am STILL waiting on a list of what Obama is going to change. I want to know exactly what he is actually going to change and what makes him different than McCain and what he says he's going to change. His campaign slogan is 'change' so lets hear it. I feel like all supporters of Obama are in this weird frame of mind. It is so bizarre. And quite frankly, it freaks me out.

What is the point of a debate?

It's not like a democrat voting for Obama is going to watch McCain speak and say "Well gee, I think I've been wrong this whole time and I am for sure going to vote for McCain now. I dont know what I was thinking!" All it does is spike discussions about things that really don't matter about the candidates like Sarah Palin's looks. It's all stupid. People are set in who they are voting for and a silly debate is not going to change that. Even if the candidate you are not voting for said he was going to do something you wanted, you'd STILL vote against him. It's how people are set in their ways.

Is it November 4th yet?

Did you ever notice

that when you bite a Triscuit in half, it looks like the inside of spongy bone? Gross!

I need to get balls.

To learn how to stand up for myself or for what is right. Instead of being nonchalant about something just to avoid confrontation. I think my problem is I'm not sure if I'm 100% right about what the arguement is about. There's always a margin of error where maybe the other person has a point and I dont want to look like an idiot by challenging them. Can you buy balls on eBay? ;-)

Teeny tiny vent.

Disclaimer: I'm in a bit of a down mood so I know I'll regret this next week. LOL

When I complain about the disrespect people have for our current President George W Bush, there's always someone that comes and says "But Amanda, that's the benefit of having free speech in this country". Yeah that's true. But it doesn't make it right to go on bashing someone who deserves respect regardless of what political party you put yourself in. To have a bumper sticker on your car that says "Sure, give Bush a third term: Prison".

Seriously? I swear, if I weren't so scared of confrontation, I'd pull up next to these idiots and have a word. Maybe I'm way off base and bias because I'm a republican and am probably the only person in this nation who hasn't said he's an idiot. But it's getting past the point of being even remotely funny. The same does go for people who call Obama many derogatory terms because of his race. I do not agree with Obama about many things but I refuse to stoop down to the level others do by thinking it's funny to criticize a president who, in my opinion, is doing his damnedest to help this country. Maybe I'm just a 'glass half full' type of person and maybe the government really is trying to kill us all. But until that happens, my mind is made up. And to all the people who call him names? You all must be perfect. A big eye roll to you.

I'm an emotional pack rat.

I save every card/letter etc that is given to me. Apparently I am an odd duck because someone at work had received a card recently, read it and then threw it out. I gasped and said "You don't save your cards?" and she said no. LOL Maybe that made me look strange but when people send something to me, it's important and special so I save it. There are many times that I'll sit and reread them.

Today I was trying to find a DVD and of course got sidetracked looking at the cards. It almost made me cry, realizing that a lot of the people that had sent me the cards (for whatever occasion), I am no longer friends with them. And it literally made my heart ache. I hate that things change. I really really hate change. And I know sometimes things change for a reason, and maybe for the better but it makes me miss what I had. I miss having that person that I can talk to for hours on the phone about absolutely nothing and everything at the same time in the middle of the night. But I guess everything happens for a reason, right? There's a reason why some people don't make it to your future and others do? Maybe I need to throw the cards away.

Instinct

Does Sprint call their new phone 'Instinct' because the decision to buy it is instinct? It's time to upgrade my phone (they have that rebate program). And I have been looking at the new phones Sprint is offering and the Instinct caught my eye. I started to (or tried to) read up on it and find out what I'm getting, how much extra I have to pay etc. But instead of a nicely laid out 'this is what you are getting and how much extra you have to pay' table, it's a website based on a movie like the arrival of the Instinct phone is this big movie premiere. I do not like that. It's all confusing and takes about 10 minutes for the darn site to load. Apparently it's been ordered though and will come in the mail soon. I just hope this doesn't end up costing me more money a month. I will be PISSED if it does and blame it all on the weird 'movie-ish' website they have for it instead of something simple. Ugh!

Also, is it really pathetic that I'm going to truly miss some of the programed ringtones on my current Katana phone? Some of those I've had for years for the same person and that's how I know it's them calling. Now I'm going to be all screwed up. :-P


Meanwhile, my new favorite song.

Ah yeah that's right
All you single people out there
This is for you

I'm not waitin' around for a man to save me
(Cos I'm happy where I am)
Don't depend on a guy to validate me
(No no)
I don't need to be anyone's baby
(Is that so hard to understand?)
No I don't need another half to make me whole

Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't
I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't

[Chorus:]
This is my current single status
My declaration of independence
There's no way I'm tradin' places
Right now a star's in the ascendant

I'm single
(Right now)
That's how I wanna be
I'm single
(Right now)
That's how I wanna be

Ah yeah Uh Huh that's right

Don't need to be on somebody's arm to look good
(I like who I am)
I'm not saying I don't wanna fall in love 'cos I would
I'm not gonna get hooked up just 'cos you say I should
(Can't romance on demand)
I'm gonna wait so I'm sorry if you misunderstood

[Chorus]

Everything in it's right time everything in it's right place
I know I'll settle down one day
But 'til then I like it this way it's my way
Eh I like it this way

Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't
I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't
'Til then I'm single

This is my current single status
My declaration of independence
There's no way I'm tradin' places
Right now a star's in the ascendant

Oprah

is really starting to get on my nerves. I never minded her much. I've been to her show once with some friends a few years ago and enjoyed myself. Oprah seemed like a decent enough person, didn't seem like the usual "prissy" type of celebrity, especially with the amount of money she has to her name.

However, when I get the chance to catch some of her shows lately, it seems she has taken on a rather unflattering approach to those she has on her show. Unless you are some high A list "important" celebrity that everybody loves, you get about 0.2 seconds of her time.

Example: Today she had Dr. Oz on. Love him! I think he is so smart and makes it easy to understand our bodies. They had a woman on via satellite phone thanking Dr. Oz for his book "You: On A Diet" and that it had helped her lose 50lbs. And she ran a 5K and got second place and she owes it all to Dr. Oz. When she first came on the show, she said "Hi Oprah! Hi Dr. Oz!" (you know, like normal people do in a polite conversation when you first meet someone) and Dr. Oz responded with a 'Hello' back. Oprah meanwhile said "Ok and what is it that you wanted to say to Dr. Oz?" -_- Are you kidding me? You mean to tell me you cannot take 2 seconds out of your precious airtime to say "Hi!" ?!??!?! Let me tell you something Oprah. You may be worth billions of dollars but you wouldnt be ANYWHERE without the fan base. Without the guests that appear on your show or the millions of people that try to get tickets every day, that wait on the phone lines for hours only to get a busy signal. I think it is awfully sad and quite frankly, ridiculous, that you seem like every time you have a "civilian" type guest and not Brad Pitt, you barely give them the time of day. Like you're timing your visit and the longer you sit on the couch with this "normal person", you may catch their "normal" germs. Give me a break! I think someone's let the money issue go to their head. I recommend you back down a bit and remember what really matters here.

So my question is....

why is it that women always say to me 'You are such a pretty girl. Some guy is going to be very lucky one day'? So where is this guy then? LOL Now, don't misunderstand me. I am ok with being single, mostly because it's all I've known. (I guess I can't say I've never dated, since I have gone on one date, if you want to call it that LOL). I just do not understand. So are women just being kind to my face? Then why say it at all? GAAH! Anywho, just wanted to type that out. Because people have been saying that a lot lately (who knows why... I've recently lost a little weight so they comment on that and add in the 'You are such a pretty and cute girl!'). Maybe that's the problem. I'm cute. I'm not a hot piece of ass with a thong sticking out and cleavage up to my neck. Well then I guess I'm going to be single forever because I refuse to sell myself short and not be me all because men "like it hot". ;-)

Gluttony

In church this morning, our pastor gave his sermon. We are doing a series on the Seven Deadly Sins. Today was week 2 so it was the second deadly sin, gluttony. We had a drama/skit performed with two congregation members. It was well thought out. The one woman played a 'Christian' (the congregation) and the man played gluttony. He had a box of Nilla Wafers and would not share with Christian.

When their skit was over, the pastor came out and started his message only, to prove his point, he had vanilla ice cream and chocolate sauce and he started eating it claiming "Nilla Wafers just do not cut it for him". LOL I thought it was very creative. However, I do not think the message got through to me as the whole day today I can only think of ice cream with chocolate sauce. I am exhibit A of his sermon. Darn! :-P

Rain

What a complete mess. We have 10 inches of rain and more to come tomorrow (5-6 more inches). I do not know where it's going to go. The ground is saturated. Our backyard flooded and the street flooded. The creek down the street has completely overflown and IDIOTS continue to drive through the water on the street. Do they not understand that the stagnant water has to go somewhere? And that them driving through it causes waves which in turn are going towards people's homes which then begins the basement flooding process. The barricades are not there for suggestions or decorations people! And the few of us standing by the flood on the street with umbrella's giving you, the person who is driving through the water, the evil eye is not some sort of flirting move we've discovered. Just do not drive through! I swear so many people lack common sense. *sighs*

Way too crowded

We went to Oktoberfest in town tonight. It was awful weather... muggy and rainy. My mom wanted to go and my dad was already up there so I went with her. I had half a beer (have to prove I'm German right? ;-) ) and a hamburger with no bun and then hightailed it out of there.

I am beginning to think I have a strong dislike for crowds. My idea of a fun night is not going somewhere where I can barely hear the voices in my head. LOL The music was so loud and I was all wet from the rain. Not fun. I think this is why I am the most abnormal 21 year old out there. And it's a nice compliment when people say "You are way more mature than most your age. You're wonderful. You're sweet. So kind." etc but I hate that the way I do things is abnormal. I wish it were normal to want to not go to a bar at 1030pm on a Friday night. I think I'm generally ok with being the abnormal "more mature" 21 year old, but sometimes it's old. It's like 'When are people going to grow up?" Why cant I just go to dinner with a friend? Why does it have to be a 'YEAH LET'S GO DRINKING!' type of thing. *sigh*

Life unfair.

In the past few days, we have had 2 women lose their babies. Both at 37 weeks and both have no idea why. I keep thinking the more I experience this, the easier it'll be. I am wrong. I still sit there when I first find out the baby has died and tear up. I want nothing more than to hug that mother and cry with her. It is awful. It is even more awful when they are so far along. They have carried this loved baby for 37 weeks. They have had baby showers, names picked out, anticipations and dreams of what their new addition is going to look like. Whose nose it'll have, whose eyes and what color hair. And now, that dream is gone all in a matter of a few words. 'There is no heartbeat'. How does someone get through something like that? Everyone thinks after 12 weeks, you're free and clear. You can begin telling everyone because you're past that 'unsure' phase. Honestly, there are no words to describe how much of a miracle having a baby truly is. When you see so many things go wrong, it truly is amazing that anyone has a healthy baby these days. I am including these women in my prayers. Prayers of healing and prayers of hope. And even a prayer of thanks that they were able to feel that baby and "know" that baby for the 37 weeks they had together. :-( We do not realize how 'good' we have it until something like this happens. Be thankful.

Meanwhile... I love me a good YouTube song...

These girls are amazing. Not to mention the song they are singing is amazing as well. I am jealous and want to sing with them. LOL

My small rant for the day.

I am so sick of the election stuff. I got "into it" at work yesterday with a nurse. I said I am for McCain/Palin and am especially excited about Palin. She then started asking "So you dont believe that women should have a choice with what they do with their body?" And, like fricken usual, I just didnt say much. I said 'I do not agree with abortion so I guess I dont believe in having a choice in that situation."

I just do not agree with killing a baby because you simply do not want it. I'm sorry. And when you have someone else growing inside of you, it's not your choice anymore. You are now caring for 2 people... yourself and that baby. This crap about conception and when exactly a fetus is considered a fetus? Are you kidding me? The moment that egg and that sperm meet is conception. It is a baby. That heart starts beating not long after at roughly 4 weeks. Most of the time, that's way before you even know you're pregnant. And I am not going to sit at work and be questioned about why I think killing a baby is wrong. It is. Plain and simple. Abortion will never be banned. It just wont, so people who are scared of the 'coat hanger days' coming back, please. You dont think people arent doing that in a day where abortion is legal? Then you're stupid. It's not just the government, it's parents. Perhaps I am more sensitive to it because I work in the OB department. I see parents losing their babies... in fact one just lost their baby last night at 37 weeks. It breaks my heart to see that. There are enough babies not making it to full term and living, we do not need to start killing them because of our own selfish reasons.

And another thought, why in the WORLD is it the government's responsibility to teach our kids about birth control? Everyone wants a less involved government and yet here we all sit on our asses saying 'Well this candidate is against abortion but doesnt want to teach our kids about other options like birth control.' SO DO IT YOUR DAMN SELF. Teach your sons to use a condom. Teach your daughters about birth control. How about even teaching them about abstinence?! *gasp* Or maybe the consequences of having sex at a young age... the possibilities they could run into including diseases that they will have the rest of their lives, that could affect them in the future and even quite possibly, pregnancy. Be a responsible parent and do it yourself. Stop relying on everyone else in this world to do it for you.