The week of the 88%

So last weekend I studied by butt off for the critical car exam we had on Wednesday. I was determined to get a good grade so that in the end of the 8 weeks, I am not struggling and praying for the bare minimum of passing. It worked. I got an 88% (B) on my first exam. I truly cannot even describe the joy I felt when I saw the grade and almost doubted it at first. LOL My studying paid off. I almost cried. :) 

Now I'm focused on completing my final holistic assessment (aka long ass care plan) and trying to simplify arterial lines and intra-aortic balloon pumps in wiki form. I also need to revamp my professional resume and start reading for critical care. Thankfully I don't work this weekend so I'm catching up on everything I can. 4th semester is a whole lot of paperwork. It's crazy. Week 4 starts Monday... 50% done! Only 6 more clinical of med surg (blah)!

I have had these ridiculous allergies for the past week and I'm soooo over it. At first I couldn't breathe out of my nose, then it felt like my sinuses had 500 lb men sitting on them. Then I was draining so much, I could have bought stock in Kleenex and now it's a cough. I WISH it was a cold because then I'd feel better. Claritin and FloNase is not helping. This poses a problem because next week for clinical, I'm in the oncology unit both days and even though this is allergies, I do not want to put these patients at risk. So, PLEASE CLEAR UP. :-| 

Week 3!

5 more weeks of critical care to go and then on to counting down the final 8 weeks. 

Tomorrow is clinical (ugh) but I think I'm in the ER so hopefully that'll be interesting. :-) Wed is our first critical care exam... studied all weekend and I am hoping it pays off :-\ I feel like everyone except me and Angel have been out partying and living it up on Labor Day weekend. We spent all morning Saturday, Sunday and basically all day today studying. After clinical tomorrow, we'll be going over everything so I'm praying it pays off. It would be so nice to do well on the first exam. 

Thursday instead of clinical, we have a simulation. I haven't even had the time to fret about it because of everything else going on. The good thing is, it's a partner sim and I'm going with Angel (CRAZY!!!) I am so happy! We'll probably get together Wed after the exam to go through the sim facesheet so we know what we're expecting. Until then, it's all about the test. After sim, I'll meet with one of my first semester mentee's and go through oral medication administration for an hour. Wish it was Sept 29th and clinical was over! :-\

Here's to another smooth sailing week....

Onto week 2

The last first week of nursing school (hopefully lol) is now behind me and what a whirlwind it was. You'd think that by now, after knowing the chaos that IS this program, I'd be used to the feeling of being overwhelmed. Alas, I am not. I did make it through the week though without completely breaking down and crying. That in and of itself is an accomplishment... but it is only week 2 and I'm not holding my breath. There are just a lot of paperwork-ish type projects to do and pairing that with everything we need to do for critical care lecture and clinical, the first 8 weeks it just really crammed. All I keep thinking is... 7 more weeks! :-) I start my first day of critical care clinical tomorrow morning and I'm SO nervous. Again, after having clinical a million times already, I don't know why I am so nervous but it's that whole 'unknown' thing. Tomorrow and Thursday I'm on the telemetry unit, the two days next week I'm in oncology, then the ER, then ICU. These clinicals are only up until September 29th so let's just keep on truckin' along. :-) I wrote my letter of intent for the final 8 weeks of the program and they will hopefully place me in Labor and Delivery for my preceptorship. I am crossing everything possible that I can cross because I am SO over Med Surg. It is not my forte and I never want to see it again after these next 7 weeks. We were assigned mentee's (first semester nursing students) for these next 7 weeks to help them along in their first semester. My class was actually the first class that had mentors from fourth semester so we're not getting to experience the other side of it. I think that definitely helps because we know how they felt when we had our mentors. I just question if I should even have a mentee, let along TWO. I don't know what the heck I'm doing LOL Today we meet with them for the first time to try to sync a few days out of the next 7 weeks to meet, go over med passing and so forth. This'll be interesting for sure. 

Before the craziness began, my friend Leah who is a phenomenal photographer, came down from WI and photographed my good friend's newborn baby as well as my best friend for her 40th birthday. I was PSYCHED!! It was so cool to see her photograph Addison. So far, the photos I've seen are amazing. I was so grateful she made the trip here... and so were my friends. <3 Hopefully we can get something together to where she comes for a weekend and people who'd like her to photograph their children/families can take advantage of that. Because numerous people have commented to me how awesome she is and that next time, to let them know she is coming. :-)

Keep praying please that I pass. LOL That is all I ask in the coming weeks.

Dipping my toes in....

Yesterday I spent all day at Angel's and we worked on concept maps (that are due throughout the first 8 weeks of the semester) med calculations and interpreting ABG's. We actually got a lot done and finished the concept maps, which will be AWESOME to not have to worry about those during the semester. Of course I got some snuggle time with Addison so that made it a little easier. ;-) 

I wrote out a 'TO DO' list last night that took up more than half of the page, just solely with school stuff. There's so much paperwork this semester that it's crazy. A few papers, writing my resume, getting letters of recommendation etc etc etc. Luckily, I have requests for letters of recommendation from one of the doctor's at work, a nurse at work, and 3 clinical instructors. I'm thinking of asking one of the other doctors and then one more nurse. 

I hate regretting things but I do wish I would have done more school stuff over break. Looking at the role transition class, there's a LOT of paperwork (a couple of papers, resume, portfolio etc). Plus I want to get something together for the students that I'll be assigned to mentor. I keep trying to think back what I wish my mentor would have told me but my mentor was awesome. 

Meanwhile, the summer is not over yet! I could not be more excited that Leah is coming to photograph Addison! It's a win win... she gets a session and I get to see Leah. :-D One of my best friend's is also going to have a session for her birthday so two sessions! It's going to be a PACKED day but all worth it. Then we're meeting up with Holly later on for dinner. Awesome! I'm looking forward to it but I'm not... because school starts up that Monday. Boo. But, the sooner I start, the sooner Santa brings me the best present of all. ;-)

Match

I keep contemplating on joining Match.com. I did make a profile but anyone can do that. I have 7 emails from members but cannot read them because I don't want to pay $35.99 for a one month membership :-\ A very large part of me also doesn't want to meet someone on the internet.... but rather just meet my knight and shining armor in person, as it's supposed to happen. But I'm an unrealistic dreamer so.... ;-) I also know I'm not going to have much time in two weeks when hell starts up again. It's so tempting though....

Cloud Nine

So the highlight of my week has definitely been the birth of my good friend's baby. You would have thought I had a baby I was and still am so excited for her. I know I work with babies all of the time but it's so different when it's someone you know. It worked out perfectly that she delivered an hour before I got to the hospital to work for the day... and then they usually keep the babies with mom for an hour so it was 3:20 by the time she was brought up to the nursery which was perfection! I got to bathe her which was awesome. She's been texting me ever since she's come home, about things. It kind of makes me feel good because it's a good feeling to know someone trusts you to ask all of these questions. 

She wanted to bathe the baby yesterday but was a little scared to do it so she asked if I'd come over and help... of course I was over the moon excited to do so. I went over for a few hours but since her boyfriend had to go into work, we decided to wait so that he could be there. So instead I just held her for a while and stared at her cute little face. There is something that emanates from babies that must make them so addictive because I want one. Right now! The fussiness is nothing to me because I usually deal with 10 babies crying at once. Having one baby to hold and care for yesterday seemed so strange! LOL I was on cloud 9. 

Isn't it amazing the power PMS has over us?

You know that quote from Evan Almighty?  "If one prays for patience, do you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If they pray for courage, does God give them courage, or does he give them opportunities to be courageous? If one prayed for their family to be closer, you think God zaps them with warm, fuzzy feelings? Or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"  

This runs through my head all of the time because I ask for patience to deal with people all of the time. Except I'd rather just be handed the patience instead of being given the opportunities because, at times, I feel like I'm just put in a giant pit of opportunities and I fail miserably. I have such a short fuse and don't really like the person I'm becoming.... I just don't know where it's all coming from. Am I just growing up and taking less crap? Probably not because I still let people roll a red carpet over the top of me and do their runway walk. To so many people I feel like I'm 10 yrs old and am this stupid little girl and I don't know why. Kind of like when people brush off their shoulder.... I feel like I'm that fuzz that was brushed off. WHY?! I am not this damaged person who has had a terrible life. I come from this wonderful family, had a picture perfect childhood and yet I'm still not happy. What the heck does it take? I'm sick of stupid people. I'm sick of selfish people. I'm sick of being so kind to people and not getting it in return. Most of all, I'm sick of letting everything bug me. I'm sick of complaining!